Assalamu’alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakaatuh.
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Kali ini saya akan sharing pengalaman lahiran putera pertama kami yang kami kasih nama Aylmer. Kami menikah pada tanggal 15 Desember 2019 di Jawa Tengah
Alhamdulillah. Telah lahir dengan selamat Putra buah hati pertama kami yang bernama Hiroyuki Kenzou Aylmer Wicaksono di Rumah Sakit Hermina Surakarta pukul 21.21 hari Minggu Tanggal 06 September 2020 maju 1 minggu dari HPL atau Hari Perkiraan Lahir, yang seharusnya tanggal 15 September 2020.
Nama "Hiroyuki" berasal dari bahasa Jepang yang artinya Kebahagiaan Yang Tersebar Luas (宏行). Nama "Kenzou" berasal dari bahasa Amerika Serikat & Canada nama "Kenzou" Artinya Kuat & Rendah Hati. Nama "Aylmer" berasal dari Inggris-Amerika yang artinya Bangsawan. Sedangkan nama "Wicaksono" berasal dari Bahasa Indonesia yang artinya Bijaksana.
Kami berdoa dalam namanya, supaya kelak dia menjadi seorang Pemimpin atau Bangsawan beragama yang Kreatif, Cerdas dan Bijaksana; yang berani mengatakan yang benar adalah benar, yang salah adalah salah. Selain itu juga mempunyai sifat yang rendah hati yang dapat memberikan manfaat dan kebahagiaan yang tersebar luas.
학습을 중단하는 사람들은 과거의 소유자가되지만, 계속 공부하는 사람은 미래의 소유자가됩니다. 절대로 새로운 것을 배우지 마라 .
We hope that he will be a brave religious leader in the future. Making the decision to have a child – it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body. A new baby is like the beginning of all things—wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities.
Having a baby is a life-changer. It gives you a whole other perspective on why you wake up every day. It’s extraordinary to look into a baby’s face and see a piece of your flesh and your spirit. It makes you realize you are a part of the human race.
Well, hello there! Long time no real talk, huh? It’s postpartum and trying to carve out some time to share Baby’s journey here has taken a bit longer than anticipated. In between learning how to feed a mini human from my own body parts, how to soothe him when he’s hysterically screaming, how to put him on some sort of “schedule”, and mixing it in with my own survival skills ie: eating, showering, changing my own diapers (TMI I know but I really didn’t know about the diaper part so I thought I’d share for interested parties) and working, I’m realizing that time as I knew it has changed. Life now works in a set of designated time windows. Baby feeds every 2.5-3 hours, Baby opens his eyes for as long as he can, or rather, we try to put him down whilst he loudly contends before Baby sleeps, and repeat.
SO, what are we waiting for? No more time for chit chat, the countdown to the next feeding has begun…
let’s go! In all honesty, I wasn’t planning on sharing Baby’s birth story–I didn’t think it was any of your business. HA!!! Well, that’s not entirely true, sometimes I just don’t think that people are truly interested in hearing yet another blogger’s story that no one asked for. BUT, that all changed when I gave birth and realized that birth is the greatest story ever told BECAUSE A HUMAN COMES OUT OF ANOTHER HUMAN. It’s truly a miracle. And yes, I know, billions of women have done it and that fact continually shocks me, but it’s still such a novel idea even now that I’ve experienced it. The fact is that I was really hoping for such a serene birthing experience that I wouldn’t have anything to talk about because I wouldn’t want to make anyone jealous about how peaceful it was.
But before I dig in, I want to preface it by saying that the fact that nothing went according to plan shouldn’t deter you any of you pregnant and future pregnant ladies who are reading this from prepping for the experience you’re hoping for. I fully believe that those experiences are possible. In fact, I believe my preparation for the birth was what got me through my experience and that’s why I’m sharing it here. It’s not to scare anyone or to provide a negative view on birth, but to encourage you to be prepared and be informed. I hope you gain the confidence you need to have a wonderful experience.
The third trimester was also just great though by the last month I was a swollen blimp. I just woke up one day and I couldn’t see ankles anymore. Hello cankles! The midwife group I was going to said that the only cure to the swelling at that point was to have the baby, which thankfully wasn’t too far away so I was fine with that answer. At one appointment they noticed that I had high blood pressure, but then they checked it again on another machine and then it was normal and it never read high again. A couple of times I noticed that my eyes were a bit blurry, but only a couple of times so I didn’t think much about it. I’m sure some of you are reading between the lines and thinking that these are signs of preeclampsia. My midwife, too, thought the same thing and kept tabs, but nothing else manifested so, no one thought much of it.
My due date came and went and I was a bit relieved as I was racing against the clock to complete some work assignments before he came. When you run your own company, you do the best you can, but there are always things that need to be done no matter how many check-off marks on your to-do list. Nonetheless, I tried to pack it all in as much as I could. I kind of think that that had some role in delaying my due date. Thankfully I have a wonderful team who has helped me prepare for this transition over the previous many months. Personally, it had always been a goal of mine to have a team in place when I got pregnant so that I could easily transition between working and babyhood. I feel really proud that that over the last few years the foundation has been set in place for that to happen. I’m so lucky to have such great people by my side who make things happen!
Once I sat down at church at 4am on Sunday, 2020, I started feeling contractions. Honestly, I was excited. I knew I had gained the tools I needed to go through the experience. I knew that had the tools that he needed to help me get through it and I had confidence in my midwives. I labored throughout that day until that night while we were watching youtube (😉and the contractions became stronger and I could no longer speak during them. I sat on my birth ball and focused inward before transferring to our bathtub for a good portion of the night. Thank heavens for bathtubs, God’s gift to pregnant blimps like me.
I actively labored throughout the night but didn’t feel ready to head over to the birthing center quite yet. As I write this I’m trying to think of a way to describe the pain of the contractions, but honestly, it’s only been 1 day since and I’m having a hard time thinking of how it works. Ha! I guess that’s how people have more babies….I will say that the meditations I learned really helped me focus and alleviate some of the pain. I mean, it wasn’t gone for sure, but it helped me get through it.
We finally headed over in the night and arrived at around 9:20 pm, 2020. I immediately threw up upon arrival–hello!–and quickly asked for a bath, surprise! I was measured at 7cm at that point so I was pretty far along and felt encouraged and ready to keep on going. I threw up a couple more times, but ain’t no thang! There are worse things that can happen
It didn’t really make much sense to me as I had no experience with seizures or any medical issues, to my knowledge, that would lead to a seizure. That and I was really out of it so I already wasn’t thinking too clearly. The doctor explained that a cesarean might be necessary so it might be best to get an epidural, of which I approved. Then I was alerted that Baby Boy was turned posterior and kept on turning around so doctor said that the c-section was looking more and more likely, of which I wasn’t pretty insistent I didn’t want. Thankfully, Doctor also did not want that and did his best to do what he could to avoid it. He had a lot of experience with forceps and said that might be the next best option. Ummm, sure! I didn’t know at this point. Whatever you think is best, doc.
I was out again until 8pm that day when all of a sudden, from what I can remember, I’m encouraged to start pushing. I saw my midwife and doula and Paul putting pressure on my pressure points while I started to push. I didn’t really know what I was pushing because I wasn’t feeling much but “push” I did! I pushed for about 3 hours before he started to crown. Once that head appeared I reached down to feel and it became much more real and very motivating so I really started to go with all my might. Weeks later all I can envision is the doctor, whose name I didn’t learn until afterwards, inserting these medieval-looking tongs up my who-ha as if steering a race car turning this way and that around each corner. I mean, he looked like he was in his element and I appreciated the confidence. A bit later, a little human emerged and as you can imagine, I’m elated and relieved and just so thankful to be done.
Well, if it’s not one thing it’s not another, because once baby arrived he had to be rushed over to the respiratory unit because there was a worry that he had swallowing meconium in the womb after seeing feces come out of me prior to delivery. Once he was feces-free, he was all mine. Get that baby on me and let me give him all the snuggles in the world! Welcome home little buddy, you’re mine now whether you like it or not!
I spent the next few days in the hospital, as opposed to the 4 hours allotted at the birthing center, and I can’t imagine it any other way. Listen, I LOVE staying in hotels and though the hospital is no luxury experience, it certainly felt that way after what I thought was going to happen. I had nurses attend to my every need and soon my mom, who had driven from Surakarta that morning, arrived, I now had my mother’s touch of course. I felt spoiled. Ha! These nurses were God’s angels.
I was so impressed with each set of nurses that visited, each better than the last. The next week I spent on our sofa at home propped up on one side. In addition to the normal pain and soreness of a vaginal delivery, my arm was somehow sore and I couldn’t move it well, which I’m assuming was because I hit something or twisted it in a funny way during the seizure episode. Additionally, I had bit my tongue during the episode so it was severely bruised with a lovely shade of navy and plum for a good few weeks. Then weird postpartum after effects like getting hangnails on every single finger and then them getting infected–who knew that was a thing?! It felt as if every part of my body was somehow affected. I mean, a bruised tongue is really the least of all my worries, but it looks bad, eh?
More than ever, I feel particularly blessed to have a little baby, especially one that’s healthy and doing well. I feel empowered by my experience even though it didn’t go as expected because, I have said it before and I mean it more than ever, birth is a miracle. It’s absolutely miraculous. Every single one. I’m grateful for the preparation I made for my birth experience. I feel stronger than ever. I’m in awe of women everywhere who have given birth. I can’t help but think of the women throughout history who didn’t have the medical care we have today and still produced billions of babies. Women are incredible. So, there you have it! There’s my story as of now and I’m seeing it unfold even more day by day.
I have found the process of writing it down to be a nice way to make amends with everything that unfolded so I may pop in every now and again to update my situation as I go along. Stay tuned!